CLEAVING AND BELIEVING

A TORAH GUIDE TO RELATIONSHIPS

Ken Graydon

We, on this Torah obedient walk, have had some manner of “ Mount Sinai experience”. Something happened to us - and it was different in every case – that led us from some other form of faith and practice to this walk. There was one particular day, perhaps a dramatic event or a gentle realisation, that revealed to us the ‘knowing’ that the words of ETERNAL spoken and written on that smoke covered mountain were true, in every respect, for us. The Ten Commandments and the laws revealed through Moses apply to us. They are truths to be lived and demonstrated. See Deuteronomy 30:11 Surely, this instruction which I enjoin upon this day is not too baffling for you, nor is it beyond reach.

Once we understand and accept that, as a basis of our faith and our salvation, we know that we can dig into the words of the Tanakh to find the answers to life’s questions. Certainly some answers require extra searching, extra prayer perhaps some fasting – other answers need an application of counselling within the believing community. No-one who is not on this Torah obedient walk has any scriptural advice of value to give you. {If they understood the Torah they would be on this walk!}

The Torah offers an unfolding revelation. Usually, the first time a topic is raised, it is ETERNAL’s ideal, His hope that we might be obedient and can be blessed beyond our fondest imaginings. Later mentions of the topic reflect ETERNAL’s disappointment and His dealing with the reality of our disobedience and constant need for correction.

Genesis is written for everybody. It is not specific to Israel . ETERNAL created the earth and everything on it. He launched His management programme for an ideal environment and growing prosperity for the people of the earth. Yet only 1656 years later the population of the earth, except for Noah and his family, are so corrupt that ETERNAL brings about a flood to eliminate them all. It does not take long to get it wrong.

Let us look at our basic relationship structure, marriage. ETERNAL outlined the ideal for this in Genesis 1:27-29 and 2:24

And ETERNAL created man in His image, in the image of ETERNAL He created him; male and female He created them. ETERNAL blessed them and said to them, “Be fertile and increase, fill the earth and master it; and rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky and all the living things that creep on earth”. ETERNAL said, “See, I give you every seed bearing plant that is upon all the earth and every tree that has seed bearing fruit; they shall be yours for food.

Hence a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, so that they become one flesh.

This is the ideal. If we become one flesh there is no scope for abuse or cruelty. We have the task of growing families for the shared responsibility of managing the earth. There was no suggestion, at the time this was written, of the need for divorce. If we and our partner are ‘one flesh’, then our children are part of that ‘one flesh’. To hurt your partner, or your children, is to practice self abuse which the Torah absolutely forbids. [See Leviticus 19:28 and Deuteronomy 14:1-2.]. Ezekiel 18:4 adds a very significant qualification to this thought:

Consider, all lives are Mine; the life of the parent and the life of the child are both Mine.

So does Jeremiah 4:18

Your conduct and your acts have brought this upon you; this is your bitter punishment, it pierces your very heart.

You may be sure that acts, which violate the basic relationships put in place by ETERNAL, will not go unpunished. See Zechariah 1:6b

In the end they had to admit, “ETERNAL has dealt with us according to our ways and our deeds, just as He purposed”.

Abraham was from a community which allowed him to marry his half-sister. ETERNAL accepted this arrangement, at that time, blessing both Sarah and Abraham to found communities of nations. Later, when the law was given to Moses it included a number of new restrictions on relatives that may not marry [see Leviticus chapter 18]. There are also severe penalties for adultery and sexual misbehaviour in the community.

 Abraham, at Sarah’s urging, practised polygamy by taking Hagar as a wife. This was their effort to help ETERNAL out by providing a way for the prophecy of multitudes of children to be fulfilled. Hagar’s child Ishmael was blessed by ETERNAL in answer to Abraham’s prayer but mother and child were sent away.

 Esau, Abraham’s grandson, chose his wives deliberately from other peoples in order to rebel against his parents. Amalek was Esau’s grandson. To understand the consequences of this, see the prophecy of Exodus 17:16 ETERNAL will be at war with Amalek throughout the ages.

 Another family that brought problems into the area was Lot . He had chosen to live in Sodom and even after he had been kidnapped, and rescued by Abraham, he returned to live among the evil lifestyle of these people. When ETERNAL destroyed Sodom He made it possible for Lot and his family to escape. You will remember that Lot’s wife was turned into a pillar of salt – only Lot and two of his daughters survived.  He was both the father and grandfather of his daughters’ children [incest creates these tortured relationships]. Lot’s daughters, believing there were no other survivors of the destruction and wanting to “fill the earth and master it” as their affirmation of life, proceeded to get Lot drunk and lay with him. From these children come the Moabites and Ammonites who are now among the “palestinian” people. Do you see how these acts of disobedience have long term consequences?

 Your local laws may be against it but the Torah accepts polygamy. There is a warning that a king should not have ‘too many’ wives [that is a subjective choice]. This was a reflection of the community caring system, where there is only charity, no institutionalised ‘social security’ and a lot of battles and hardships to be encountered. More children offered an increased possibility of more surviving and so support the older members of the family and increase the wealth.

  ETERNAL still likens His relationship with His people as a marriage, [Isaiah 62:4,5 Hosea 2:18,19], so the institution of marriage is to be kept up. There is no Torah equivalent of ‘living together’ or trial marriages. Most often a wife would be chosen for a son by his parents. People who follow this practice today tend to have more stable marriages. [Some Orthodox Jews, many Japanese families, some Christian sects, etc.].

The Torah is persistently adamant that people who are on this walk are not to become involved with the errant behaviour of the other people they live amongst. Do not take on their g-ds, their customs, their festivals or any of their sinful ways. You have to accept responsibility for your own self. You have a one-on-one relationship with ETERNAL. Read Psalm 25: 8-14 Good and upright is ETERNAL; therefore He shows sinners the way. He guides the lowly in the right path, and teaches the lowly His way. All ETERNAL’s paths are steadfast love for those who keep the decrees of His covenant. As befits Your name, ETERNAL, pardon my iniquity though it be great. Whoever fears ETERNAL shall be shown what path to choose. He shall live a happy life and his children shall inherit the land. The counsel of ETERNAL is for those who fear Him; to them He makes known His covenant.

If you are ready to have ETERNAL guide your steps, pardon your misdeeds and give you a happy life you have to make the first move. Jeremiah 29: 12,13 When you call Me and come and pray to Me, I will give heed to you. You will search for Me and find Me, if only you seek Me wholeheartedly.

ETERNAL is only waiting for you to call on Him and pray to Him so that He can act in your life.

kennygee@bigpond.com

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